"It's a beautiful day up in heaven. Jesus is rounding up his tiniest angels, to go live on earth, and be born. One of the sweetest angels says to Jesus "I don't want to leave, I like it here, and I will miss you". He reassures the scared little angel that everything will be okay, and that he is just going for a visit. He is still not swayed on this idea. So Jesus kneels down, and says, "How about if you leave half of your heart here with me and take the other half with you, will that be okay?" The angel smiles and says, "I guess that will work". But the little angel is still a little scared. He asks,"Will I be okay with only half of my heart?" Jesus replies,"Of course you will, I have other angels there that will help out, and you will be fine." Then Jesus gives the angel more details about his plan. He says "When you are born, your mommy will be scared, so you have to be strong, and when you feel weak just remember that I have the other half of your heart". "Enjoy your time with your family, play and laugh everyday." "And when its time to come back to heaven, I will make your heart whole again. Always remember that you are not broken, just torn between two loves."
Yesterday the cardiologist emailed me to let me know that she has contacted several colleagues to see if any of them might have more information on the findings from the last scan. Hopefully they will have seen a restricted ductus before and give us some more insight on the best way to treat the condition. She also requested that we come back in two weeks instead of four so now we will be seeing them next Friday at 10am. We also have our OB appointment next Thursday so we will get to see/hear Brynn twice in one week! She continues to kick and squirm pretty frequently which is a great relief to me (she's still in there!).
We decided to register over the weekend despite our setback. We are hoping to remain positive and optimistic. Our wonderful friends Amy and Steven and their beautiful baby Liam were very helpful with this overwhelming process ("Don't waste money on that, we never used it!"). At times, registering made the differences between our baby and a "normal" baby glaringly obvious. Breast pump? Nursing bra? Bottles? There is a good chance Brynn will be fed special formula through a feeding tube the first few years of her life. No reason to register for those items yet, until we see if she will be strong enough to regain her suck and swallow reflex. Crib? Stroller? Car seat? Yes, yes, yes! Hopefully she will need all of these upon her return from the hospital. We even found a mobile made with tiny hearts. :)
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